junkies

I was sitting on a sofa at this band members house watching him broadcast off his computer. His parents was right next to me. Whoever I came to this place with was in the kitchen. I was curious on seeing and meeting his wife and kid. I don't remember half the stuff but somehow I was outside andet his little girl played awhile and then had to go. This guy comes over in a car and says can I drive him home. I'm get in and me that guy and the band member all in the car go-to his place. There was parents grandparents and a bunch of young people all ready to do all kinds of drugs I've never seen before. I finally met the little girls mother she was wasted. I told them I've never seen or heard of these things before. They all started by eatting these mushrooms then drinking, pills, and smoking. I thought to myself someone is going to o.d. but I just kept my mouth shut and watched them all. They began to change their behaviors. They was looking at things and saying things that made no sense. I was thinking to myself they are nuts and wonder what they think of me since I wasn't seeming to fit in much. Then it happened some girl brings me this tube of blue juice with measurements on it. I drink some of it and say that's all I want nothing else for me I've never even had this before. What is it? Not sure if she even told me. The next thing I know is I have tears coming out my eyes and laughing so hard but I don't even know why. I kept asking the grandparents what these numbers say in this cup as I tired to read it to them. Then some how I was in this other room someone was talking to me I dunno what was happening lips moving but what was said I dunno. Someone said they need to stop feeling because whatever they took wasn't working. I tried to walk around see if I could. I didn't do anything else after that just tired to get to know these people. Then the dream ended and I woke up.

lost n broken

As I look at other people and their lives how it's changed overtime. I try to sit outside myself and see what has changed in my life and I can't find anything. Maybe I'm just insanity for the rest of my life doing the samething over and the results always the same. You've already grew up had multiple dates, homes, jobs, kids, etc. You've made and shared the good and bad memories. I just here pretending I've experienced those things. You have pictures on your walls of family and friends. I have pictures on my wall of strangers I've met once but never see again. When I think back to a memory all I have are movies, books, and anything that's not real because it's someone else's story. I'm just an empty page about to expire and fade away into the nothingness I've become.